Welcome

Hey friends! Welcome back to Mind and Spirit, the podcast where Catholic faith meets psychology and we explore what real healing looks like. I’m Luke Johanni, your Catholic-integrated therapist; helping you bridge faith and mental health so you can find peace, purpose, and restoration.

Don’t forget to subscribe, follow @LukeJohanni on social media, and visit RestoredChristianCounseling.com to submit your questions—they might even be featured in a future episode.

Let’s dive in.

The Issue of Pornography

In the last episode we talked about authentic masculinity; that a man grows into maturity not by dominating or by suppressing his emotions but by learning to order his strength toward self‑giving love.

This week we turn to one of the biggest forces working against that maturation: pornography. Porn promises instant pleasure and liberation, yet countless men find themselves trapped in this habit that leave them feeling empty, out of control, and ashamed.

And the issue is not confined to a small, hidden group. A recent Barna Group survey found that roughly three‑quarters (75%) of Christian men and about 40 percent of Christian women acknowledge viewing pornography, numbers that are only slightly higher for the general population.

This is not an episode about blame or moralizing. This is about the psychology, the neuroscience, the lived experience, and hope. Because healing is possible. Freedom is possible.

How Porn Hijacks Our Life

1st Porn Hijacks Our Hormones

Why is pornography so appealing?

Research has shown, that when men feel lonely, stressed, rejected or anxious, a few clicks on a phone or laptop offer a powerful chemical escape. Videos and images trigger surges of dopamine (the brain’s reward chemical), while requiring (pretty much) nothing in return. Over time the brain adapts and begins to crave more novelty and more intense imagery to achieve the same high.

This “Coolidge effect” (as its been called) is described by neuroscientists and popularized in the book Your Brain on Porn helps explain why occasional viewing easily spirals into compulsive cycles. Because porn is anonymous, accessible and available in endless variety, it creates a kind of (shall we say) “safe intimacy” that seems to protect the user from rejection or vulnerability while gradually rewiring his mind.

Now let’s look at a few ways in which porn, hijacks us.

2nd Porn Hijacks Your Development

Early Exposure

Porn starts by disrupting our development. The pervasiveness of pornography means that most people are exposed at very young ages.

Fight the New Drug reports that the likely age for first exposure is during the tween years and that most children see pornography by age 13, with some exposed as young as seven. A nationally representative study of U.S. teens aged 14–18 estimated that 84.4 percent of boys and 57 percent of girls had viewed pornographic material. Some studies even document children encountering pornography as early as five years old.

Becomes Coping

Early exposure is deeply concerning because of the developing adolescent brain; repeated viewing of explicit scenes at these fragile development times can wire neural pathways toward depersonalized, compulsive use and can shape a person’s expectations of sex long before he or she understands intimacy.

Additional, during these years of development, children are learning how to rationalize and how to emotionally respond to life’s stressors. Research shows, that this earlier pornography use, stunts the developmental growth of children in both their higher functioning and emotional regulation.

Resulting in children, who become teens and then adults, NEEDING the hyper-stimulation of pornography and sexual behavior to carry on with what would be considered normal daily life stressors.

The Concern of Access

We’re living in a culture that is becoming more sexualized every year. Not only has nudity and sexual content increased across TV, movies, music videos, and even advertising, but kids now carry an entire media universe in their pockets.

Ninety-five percent of teens have smartphones, and almost half report being online “almost constantly.” Younger kids aren’t far behind. 42% of children ages 8–12 have their own smartphone, and they now average nearly five hours of screen time a day, not including schoolwork.

When you combine that level of access with platforms where sexualized content is only a scroll away, the chances of a child or teen encountering explicit material, intentionally or unintentionally, are higher than ever. This is not about one website or one bad choice; it’s about growing up in an ecosystem where sexual content is increasingly normalized, algorithmically pushed, and harder than ever to avoid.

The cultural tide has shifted, and unless we help young people understand what they are seeing and how it affects them, that tide will shape their identity long before they know how to navigate it.

Impact on Faith Communities

The widespread nature of pornography also means that it’s shaping attitudes within faith communities.

According to the Barna Group’s 2024 report Beyond The Porn Phenomenon, roughly 75 percent of Christian men and 40 percent of Christian women admit to using pornography (at least monthly). Christian pastors are not immune either: two‑thirds report having struggled with porn in the past.

These numbers underscore that porn use is not a fringe problem; it is a mainstream reality even among those who take faith seriously.

3rd Porn Hijacks Your Relationships

A third way that porn hijacks our life through objectifying others. It distorts our relationships, including wife, family, friends and God.

Long-term exposure to pornography affects the brain and the heart. Neurologically, repeated consumption desensitizes your dopamine receptors, so that ordinary pleasures (a hug, a conversation, a meal) feel dull by comparison. So, your brain begins to prefer “artificial” stimulation over real connection.

In relationships, porn encourages objectification. Statistically 1 in 3 pornographic videos contains violence and aggression. This constant stream trains the viewer to see people as parts and performances instead of real people. Research has further linked early and frequent porn consumption with increased acceptance of violence against women and with greater sexual aggression.

This one may make sense to many of you without further explanation. But it does deserve a conversation. As that is, I won’t dive deeper into this today, because I am planning to do an episode on just this in the future.

4th Porn Hijacks Your Cognitive Function

A fourth way that porn hijacks our life is through distorting our cognitive functioning.

Pornified Worldview

When porn use begins in childhood or adolescence, we often see the development of what some authors call a pornified worldview. This means that repeated exposure to objectifying, unrealistic sexual content has trained the brain to interpret the world through a sexualized lens, even in situations that aren’t sexual at all.

It becomes an automatic filter.

Example

Think of walking through Walmart: a woman passes by, and before you even realize it, your eyes scan, compare, and sexualize specific parts of her body. In that moment, your brain wasn’t engaging with her as a whole person.

It was running a conditioned script. And many men don’t even notice they’re doing it until they mentally step back and check themselves. Repeated exposure wires the brain toward objectification, unless intentional healing and re-training occur.

5th Porn Hijacks Your Identity

Porn also distorts self‑concept. Many men describe feeling “split” within themselves. They know their use conflicts with their values yet feel unable to stop. Shame follows the rush like relief, leading to secrecy, deeper isolation and, paradoxically, more compulsion.

To visualize this, think Trigger → Urge → Use → Dopamine relief → Shame  → Isolation → More distress → Repeat

Most men try to break this cycle with willpower alone. But willpower fails because the cycle isn’t merely moral; it’s neurological and emotional. You cannot shame or hate your way out.

Now, with this knowledge of the five ways that porn hijacks us, what can we do about it?

Breaking the Cycle

Healing begins with understanding this cycle and taking small, concrete steps to disrupt it. So, let’s get concrete. Here are five evidence-based steps from Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), plus one relational step, to start rewiring your brain and rebuilding your integrity.

Frist Step: Awareness

The first step is awareness. Keep a log of urges: note the time, what you were feeling, and what happened right before the urge. Patterns will emerge. You may discover that boredom, stress or loneliness are the real triggers, not sexual desire.

A great free tracker is the Fortified App. There are things you can pay for on the app, but tracking and a lot of the analytics are free.